Tools and Resources to Teach You Mindfulness in the Context of your Divorce
If you’ve been following our recent blog series with family therapist and mindfulness teacher Joree Rose, you’ll have seen how mindfulness can bring immense benefits to your divorce journey. Being mindful can help you feel calmer, be proactive, control your emotions, and become less inclined to take other people’s comments or actions personally. When acting from a state of mindfulness, you’re more likely to make wise decisions that will have a positive, long-term impact on your post-divorce life.
Here, we provide a round-up of some of our favorite resources on mindfulness that can help you to be mindful during your divorce and beyond.
1) Joree Rose
Joree Rose’s website is chock-full of excellent insights and advice on incorporating mindfulness into your daily life. Among many other things, she offers free guides designed to help you learn how to reframe challenges as opportunities, treat yourself with more compassion, and develop a joint mindfulness practice with your children. She also offers a regular podcast called “Journey Forward with Joree Rose.” Her podcast features inspirational interviews, personal anecdotes, and a science-backed tool to help you consciously create the life you want to live. Tuning in will give you the perspective, encouragement, and advice you need as you go through your divorce and develop a mindfulness practice.
YouTube can also be an excellent resource for furthering your mindfulness practice, particularly when going through a divorce. We’re especially fond of the following links:
Guided Meditation: Moving Through Divorce and Healing. Meditation goes hand-in-hand with mindfulness practice. Mindfulness meditation allows you to sit with your thoughts without judging them. In this inspiring 20-minute video, a guide will help you mindfully come to terms with the divorce, look forward to starting your new life, and visualize a future bright with possibilities.
Affirmations for Parting Ways, Divorce, Separation, and Broken Hearts. Affirmations are short, declarative, positive statements that play an essential role in mindfulness practice. When you repeat affirmations several times daily, the statement can feel and become increasingly accurate. For example, if you repeat several times daily: “I am calm with dealing with my ex,” eventually you will come to believe that statement, and your behavior will grow into those words. This 8-minute video offers several affirmations to help you get through difficult moments in divorce and focus on positivity.
3) Mindfulness Exercises
Being mindful doesn’t happen overnight–the more you practice it, the better results you’ll have. On your divorce journey, strengthen your mindfulness practice by trying the following exercises.
Exercises for Compassion. As Joree Rose discussed in a previous blog post, it’s essential to have compassion for yourself and others during the divorce process. Mindfully practicing compassion can help you be less reactive to others’ comments and behavior and less hard on yourself for your own mistakes and faults.
The site Positive Psychology offers six exercises that will help you to develop self-compassion. You will learn how to affirm your feelings without judgment, express compassion for yourself through writing, and train your mind to steer away self-critical thoughts, among other things.
To improve your compassion for others, particularly a difficult ex-spouse, check out these tips on how to feel compassionate toward someone you don’t like. Even if you don’t dislike your ex, these suggestions can help you peaceably work your way through rocky moments in your divorce when they aren’t behaving at their best.
Mindful listening. Learning to listen to others–really listen, not just waiting to speak– can be instrumental to reaching an accord with your ex in your divorce journey. Become a better, more mindful listener by using the exercises and advice offered on Search Inside Yourself Leadership Institute and Mindful.com.
Breathing. When tensions are high during the divorce journey, hitting pause on your emotions and taking deep breaths is a simple but effective technique to regain control of yourself. Check out Positive Psychology’s seven deep-breathing methods and start breathing your way to a calmer state.